We Got GTA in Real Life? | Objectively Bad Podcast #87

Welcome to the 87th Episode of the Objectively Bad Podcast! 

In todays episode Chad talks about a real life GTA story that happened near him, Dan fills us in on the international crime syndicate in Melbourne and we rant about fitness, health and why watching sitcoms is bad for your mental health!

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Transcript

Intro

SPEAKER_01 0:04

Hello people, welcome back to the Objectively Bad Podcast. Oh, hi. Yeah, I blanked. Sorry about that. Um That's alright. First of all, no, you fucking don't. So I just sometimes it just it doesn't work.

SPEAKER_00 0:30

It's okay, and that's okay.

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Sometimes it just doesn't come out. Sometimes it just doesn't happen.

SPEAKER_00 0:38

And that's okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:40

I need like Viagra for my speech. That might help.

SPEAKER_00 0:44

Viagra for confidence? Yes. I think that's actually just liquor.

SPEAKER_01 0:49

Hmm, fair point. But uh weirdly enough, it also it it helps your confidence, but it also doesn't help the you know Tro.

SPEAKER_00 0:59

It's kind of like reverse Viagra.

SPEAKER_01 1:01

Exactly. It's reverse Viagra. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:04

How have you considered becoming a raging alcoholic so that you can just simply socialize a little bit better?

SPEAKER_01 1:11

That's a good question. Uh I've considered it. I am considering it. I will consider it continually for the rest of my life. Okay. Okay. It's up there. It's in the thoughts. Good, good to know. Thank

Real Life GTA

SPEAKER_01 1:24

you. Uh now speaking of alcohol driving.

SPEAKER_00 1:28

Yeah. Uh just uh like peanut butter and jelly.

SPEAKER_01 1:32

Exactly. Go right together. Now, uh Chad has a story for us today that is related to. Yes, I do.

SPEAKER_00 1:37

Um also in case you somehow don't figure out, I'm Chad and this is Dan. And objectively bad.

SPEAKER_01 1:43

You don't know if we focus on this point.

SPEAKER_00 1:45

You know, and if you don't, welcome. Yeah. Listen to our stuff. It's all right. Something. Uh, it works.

SPEAKER_01 1:53

Well, it's objectively bad.

SPEAKER_00 1:54

That's kind of the whole joke, but we, anyways, I got a I got a story for us today. Um, weirdly GTA related in a way in that it's technically Grand Theft Auto, which I feel like is a phrase that's said so much in conjunction with the video game that it's forgotten to be like the kind of legal jargon for stealing a car. Yeah. Um, but I have a tale of a real GTA. Um, I would say usually theft is is wrong. I'd say this is still wrong. I'd also say this is funny. Um so I'll read you, I'll read you the title and then I'll I'll let you react and we'll go from there. Man charged after allegedly taking Boulder Colorado EV fire truck on police pursuit, bail set at $100,000.

SPEAKER_01 2:51

Jesus, okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

Um, so he stole a fire truck. Uh they really love throwing in that it's it's an EV firetruck. Yeah, like I guess it's a detail. Um I I mean this is purely informational. This website doesn't have any political leanings. I could see if conservatives want to be like, it cost so much money and it got stolen, blah blah blah blah blah, but whatever. I don't know. It's cool that they have EVs, like, especially for fire trucks aren't necessarily going that far, so they don't need to have a big gas tank. Yeah. Um, but yeah, uh, authorities say the suspect stole a $1.7 million electric fire engine outside the Boulder County jail before leading officers on a multi-agency pursuit through Boulder and Longmont. Uh for reference for people who don't live here, it's two, it's two cities, uh, about like a hundred thousand population, roughly. Uh, Boulder to Longmont, depending on where you're at, and traffic is like 20-30 minutes apart-ish. So, like, he he didn't go super far, but he traveled. He was probably driving for like 30, 40 minutes, maybe even longer than that. I don't know they say how long the chases. So, essentially, here's a story. Um, middle of the night, uh, fire truck and I want to say other emergency vehicles are going to the the county jail in Boulder, Colorado to assist with something. I think someone was having a medical emergency, and so they did their jobs.

SPEAKER_02 4:28

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Someone essentially left the keys in the very expensive fire truck and made it very stealable. Now, on one end, I kind of get it, because if you were to steal a car, where's the worst place to steal a car in front of? A jail. Yep. There's a heavy like cop presence, and it's literally the place they'll take you once you're caught. So, on one end, kind of fair. Uh, I feel bad for uh the the fireman who probably did it because I could see them getting shit. I hope they don't get fired. I mean, I don't know, maybe they're terrible at their job. I don't know, but like hopefully it was just a small mistake and everything is okay. Um, but what's even funnier is the person who stole the fire truck was a person who was actively getting released from jail. I believe I'm fairly sure about that. I could be wrong. Um, but I love that they're like, all right, I finally got released, you know, it's my time. Anyways, I'm gonna steal this fire truck right in front of everyone. Honestly, boulder. Probably right in front of cameras. It's kind of a baller move. It's showing dominance. Um, so it's probably like 3:30 in the morning-ish. Uh, they're driving through Boulder, they end up driving through driving up to Longmont. They get to like the main street of Longmont once they finally get stopped. Um, so they drove for probably like 45-ish minutes, roughly. Um, there were uh multiple efforts to attempt to stop them. There was multiple times where they tried to spike the fire truck. So, you know, like they throw the spikes out on the road to get the wheels, and they were unsuccessful. Uh, they did finally spike the truck once they reached Longmont. Um, they also rammed the fire truck multiple times. Uh, I think I have a quote here. Um officials estimate the stolen engine fire stolen electric fire engine valued at roughly 1.7 million. They fucking love bringing up the price of this. Yeah, it's like sure. Cool. Guys, chill. You already said it once. Anyways, uh, sustained significant damage during the incident. Three additional vehicles belonging to the Boulder County Sheriff's Office were also damaged during the pursuit. An affidavit places the total damage to the fire engine alone at a minimum of $25,000, including destruction to all four tires and exterior components. Uh, God, there was something oh yeah. One deputy alone reportedly struck the vehicle approximately 15 times in efforts to bring the pursuit to a safe end. Um, yeah, as the situation escalated, deputies also used direct vehicle intervention tactics, including multiple deliberate ramming maneuvers while the fire engine was traveling at speeds estimated between 50 and 70 miles per hour. That is pretty quick for a fire truck. Rough estimate. That's pretty quick for a fire truck. That's like a hundred kilometers per hour in that range. Like, that's not slow, especially for someone who has presumably never driven a fire truck. And fire trucks are not small vehicles, like they're not zippy. Now, it's the middle of the night, and they did end up driving on the highway, so like it makes sense, but also they were being pursued and driving that fast. Like, vehicles are ramming into them.

SPEAKER_01 7:53

All I'm gonna say, like, they they bring up this point of there's $25,000 in damages of the tires and like being rammed into. He may have stolen the fire truck, but the cops did the damage. Let's be real here. They put the rammed into it, they shouldn't be complaining.

SPEAKER_00 8:07

Yeah, it would have run out of gas, anyways. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 8:10

They could have just followed him until he ran out of ran out of yeah, fuel electricity, yeah, and just like stopped him.

SPEAKER_00 8:16

They didn't have to ram him. To be fair, I think he was driving recklessly, so I think the idea was like the quicker we stop him, the sooner we stop something that could be much worse. Yeah, no, uh it was the middle of the middle, so um, so they finally spike the the truck, he gets out of the truck, he attempts to run away. It doesn't. He it takes them like two minutes. Um, they made the arrest at 4 14 a.m. So the good news was it's truly like middle of the night. Yeah, so feasibly no one should have been that affected by things. I do think it'd be funny if you were like, I don't know, you work like a late night shift, you're driving home, um, and you see a fire truck like whizzing by, so you're like, oh, I gotta get out of the way. And then you see cops trying to ram into the fire truck, and you're like, wait what the fuck? Yeah, that's good. I I think that would be funny. Um, yeah, they did arrest him. This is my favorite quote from this article. Following his arrest, authorities say the suspect made unusual statements, including a claim that the vehicle belonged to him because of the Lord. Oh, hell yeah. Which I love. I it I I think, and again, they're painting a story, but it's kind of to show like, yeah, this guy probably isn't that mentally stable. Um, because even like a normal religious person doesn't say shit like that.

SPEAKER_01 9:43

No, but I do think the the best reasoning for anything in life is that it was promised to you by the Lord.

SPEAKER_00 9:49

Ah, I love that reason because it's so like nonsensical, and you're like, well, that's not evidence, and they go, That's because you don't believe. It's like you can't it's you can't argue with it. To be fair again, because you're trying to argue with crazy, and it's not worth it. No, ever.

SPEAKER_01 10:06

But it is it is awesome when someone says, like, no, this was this was promised to me by a higher power. This was so I must have it.

SPEAKER_00 10:13

God told me to steal this fire truck and try to see how long I can last. Um, the last thing, uh, right after that quote, it says, Investigators have not indicated any evidence supporting that claim.

SPEAKER_01 10:29

Well which Chad, God told me that it was true, so I'm gonna believe it.

SPEAKER_00 10:34

So right. I love that they said investigators have not indicated any evidence. Yeah, there's never gonna be evidence that something belongs to you because of the Lord.

SPEAKER_01 10:45

Um imagine this was the crime where we found out God was real. Just a random investigator from like Boulder was like, they they dug deep on this case and found that yeah, God's real. Um here he is.

SPEAKER_00 10:57

They're like investigators actually have indicated evidence. God did tell him to steal this.

SPEAKER_01 11:02

Yeah, they bring him to like the the courthouse, he testifies in front of a judge.

SPEAKER_00 11:07

He's like, I thought it'd be funny. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:11

Honestly, I think it would be the funniest outcome if God was just like a frat bro that thought doing funny shit like that was great.

SPEAKER_00 11:17

Yeah, or or another another good one is he's like, the Lord told me, God told me, and it turns out it's just a guy named Jesus. Would be pretty funny. It was a cellmate Jesus. I'd I'd respect the hell out of Jesus if he was like, You gotta steal that car. By the way, I'm God, and then the guy's crazy enough and he's like, I gotta steal that car. Jesus told me. Um, yeah, I think as far as crimes go, like it's pretty victimless. I saw another article, they were like, There's like property damage to like mainly just the fire truck and like other police cars. I think like a cop or two suffered like minor injuries, but not nothing at all serious, nothing that's really even taken them out of force. Um, pretty victimless crime. Outside of some tax dollars, which like, yeah, I I guess that's annoying, but honestly, it's really funny. Um, and as far as crimes go, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:22

Would you would you give would you give us some tax dollars for a bit of entertainment? I would.

SPEAKER_00 12:29

Yeah. It's because look, I'm not saying go commit a crime. Bad. I hot take, hot take, crime bad. Chat for president 2028. That's I'm bad. Fuck you're right, I'm not old enough. You running for president is technically illegal, so that's true. Uh 20 2036. There we go. I'll be old enough. Um yeah, that's uh hard stance, crime bad. Unless Unless funny? Yeah, that's my that's my question. Unless funny. Um, but yeah, it's kind of interesting to talk about GTA often and then get to actually see real Grand Theft Auto.

SPEAKER_01 13:30

No, genuinely, whenever like I mentioned Grand Theft Auto, just like the the phrase, I don't think of the crime ever. I don't I even even though the words theft and auto are in there, I just I just never relate it to being car theft. I always forget that like that's the point of it. And I just think of oh yeah, the video game. Like even when like talking about Grand Theft Auto, I have to like remember like, oh yeah, the point of this game is stealing cars, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00 13:58

Like it means something. Yeah, well, that's the other thing, is like I feel like the GTA game started out kind of more that way, but um I mean you can still do it. And there's still to be fair, you steal cars all the fucking time in that game.

SPEAKER_01 14:15

Yeah, I feel like it's not like it's like the low crime, but it doesn't feel grand compared to like Kayaparico and the Diamond Casino Heist, you know, it's just theft auto.

SPEAKER_00 14:24

Yeah, it's not much grandness, there's not much grandeur to it. Sure. I would say stealing a $1.7 million fire truck, I'd say that's grand.

SPEAKER_01 14:33

Now that would be cool if you could do it on GTA. I'd be down with that. I think like the most expensive car stealing mission in the game is the salvage yard. And I think the most you can get is like 300k.

SPEAKER_00 14:44

Yeah, I mean 300k ain't cheap. It's not bad, but it's not. I mean, with inflation these days.

SPEAKER_01 14:50

But the thing is, you're stealing you're stealing a car that's like if you were to buy it on the website, it's like two mil when you sell it for 300k.

SPEAKER_00 14:59

It's it's uh yeah, it's it's the fucking um all those car like the business car missions are always like that, where they're like, all right, this car's worth two million, you gotta steal it. Every time a bullet hits it, you lose a thousand dollars. Also, when you go to sell it, you get 80 grand. And it's like, what the fuck is this shit? Who's pocketing like 95% of the profit when I do all the work? And you own the business, and I own the business.

SPEAKER_01 15:34

It's a bad business model. It really is. All the money's going to the the crate deliverer, the cargo ships. Yeah. The damn middleman's taking all the money. Yeah, RIB.

SPEAKER_00 15:48

Um literally, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 15:51

It is insane. Well,

The International Crime Syndicate Attacking Melbourne

SPEAKER_01 15:52

yeah, moving on to another crime story, probably a little bit less funny, bit more intense. Uh, I live in Melbourne, and a few nights ago there was uh a shooting, or like a week ago, maybe at this point, there was a shooting outside of uh a brothel called Gotham City, because first of all, it's called Gotham City. There's literally a bat symbol on the ground outside of it, like a light that shines. I've walked past it. Uh I I didn't know it was a brothel at first. I just thought it was just like I didn't know to be honest, but then it's like a club or something. And then I saw a truck driving through the city, and it has Gotham City, has a bunch of like nearly naked ladies on the side, so I'm like, I uh dodger. Uh but there was a shooting outside of Gotham City. Also, another reason why it's called that. Melbourne used to be called Batmania for a brief few years. Really? Yeah, because the person who founded the city is called John Batman. I'm not kidding.

SPEAKER_00 16:48

I've Okay, I will be listening to what you're saying. I will also be looking that up because that is so fucking hilarious.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

Yeah, it was it was known as Batmania in like the 1800s for a couple of years, and it was founded by John Batman.

SPEAKER_00 17:02

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 17:03

I will say I think his first name being John is like the best thing.

SPEAKER_00 17:07

Yeah, because it it's like one of those things where they're like, who invented the telescope? And it was like John Telescope. Literally John Batman. It's perfect. So it is literally John Batman. Oh my god, I I love this so much. Uh between 1835 and 1837. Yep. Two years. God, that's beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 17:30

Yeah, so there was a shooting outside of there uh a few nights ago. And oh yeah. It no one was hurt, but it was like a drive-by shooting at a club, and I saw a news story yesterday that apparently for the past few months, I didn't know about this until this one happened. There's been a ongoing attack. Oh, there's been ongoing attacks on the different nightclubs and bars and restaurants around Melbourne. Um, I don't know why it's happening still, but apparently it's an I want to say Iraqi crime syndicate that's been attacking Melbourne bars, clubs, and shit for seemingly an unknown reason. I think it's due to like illegal alcohol schemes or something. Don't really know. Uh, but I saw a TikTok. So many words there. I know. I saw a TikTok earlier today that uh basically the Iraqi crime syndicate sent a message to someone, either it was either like a bar owner or the police or just someone in Melbourne, they sent them a threat, basically. And I'll read the threat because it's insane. So the crime syndicate reportedly sent a chilling message to multiple Melbourne venue owners over the last week. And the quote is We're after you, your family, your businesses, homes, and souls. We will take it by force. The police can't help you, we won't stop till we get what we want.

SPEAKER_00 18:55

I that's so wild because A, it's not even an ultimatum, it's just a threat. Yeah. It it's not like stop doing this, it's just I'm gonna kill you. Also, your souls? Wild.

SPEAKER_01 19:12

It's crazy.

SPEAKER_00 19:14

Um they said they're gonna physically take it. I want to sit down with them and see their process for physically taking a soul. I guess I'd just be killing them. But like, do they have a separate thing where they're like, I've killed you, now I must extract your soul?

SPEAKER_01 19:27

Yeah, so like the thing I don't understand is that like they don't really state what they want. I don't I don't know what they want. Like, do they just want clubs to shut down? Do they because they're not making money off of it. Yeah, that's the thing.

SPEAKER_00 19:43

It's um I think it's just straight up terrorism. Seems like it. Also, I don't know if it's for sure Iraqi, but it's something more to it.

SPEAKER_01 19:54

It it's weird because they they call they call I've seen in some news articles it's Iraqi crime syndicate, but then they also call them the cartel, and the cartel was like very well known for being like a Mexican and like Southern American, Central American gang. Yeah. So I don't know what's going on. Um the discount cartel. Apparently it's um there's a guy in like apparently there's a uh a guy that was from Baghdad who lives in Melbourne who who murdered someone and he's like related to it. I don't know. There's been more than 30 firebombings, kidnappings, and shootings targeting Melbourne's nice spots. I'm literally just reading off a TikTok, I'm watching right now. Um kind of insane.

SPEAKER_00 20:43

Kind of insane, yeah. I I feel like when it comes to kind of the like again, crime bad, hard stance. Um, but when there's like interesting crimes or or like something that I can be behind a little bit more, like stealing the fire truck is kind of funny, or like the people that rob like I don't know, jewelers, like robbing people's bad, but also or like if you rob like the people who rob like Kim Kardashian installer shit. I'm not saying that's a good thing, but I'm a lot less against it because they just stole from a rich person who is inevitably gonna be fine. And their their reasonings for their crime is not you know aggression or like something, you know, not vindication, like it's just I want money and I want to live a nice life, and they decided to commit a crime. And that's stealing uh it's a pretty victimless crime in the sense of you're stealing from someone's wallets, but you're stealing from a rich person, you know, kind of Robin Hood in it. Um without probably the giving it to the poor, it's probably just giving it to themselves. Again, I'm not saying I'm pro-crime, even though all of the other words make it sound like I am. I'm just saying this is more interesting. It's also sometimes when it doesn't when you don't see it. It doesn't feel like it feels like fiction. Yeah. Yeah, it feels like you're watching like Oceans 11 is so fun. Technically speaking, you root for the bad guys. I play GTA for a living. Like well, yeah. Like, and that's the thing with the the people in GTA is they're just guys who are trying to make money. Like, I mean, they kill, which is bad. Again, murder bad? Look at this guy with his high takes. Uh uh, yeah. Um, but like, they're mostly just doing things to make money.

Is Hating Skylar White Objectively Bad?

SPEAKER_01 22:53

Yeah. Um, I will say this is you've brought up a point that's led me in a different direction. So there's been uh this came out a while ago, but uh, you know the show Malcolm in the Middle. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Yeah, I know, weird, weird segue.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

I don't know where this is going.

SPEAKER_01 23:12

But there was a reboot of Malcolm Malcolm in the Middle where like the cast came back together, and there was a uh like an interview show with Brian Cranston and the the guy who plays Malcolm, I can't remember what his name is. Frankie Frankie Munos. Yeah. Um yeah, they had like an interview together, and he brought up Frankie Munos brought up that he hated Skylar White, like hated her. Oh yeah, yeah. And it got a lot of backlash because and I for many reasons, but I've seen a lot of discourse over like social media the past like week or two about like if you hate Skylar, it shows you're like a bad person or whatever. And and there's there's been a thing of like I've seen like if you go on a date with someone, uh, don't ask them for their political opinions, just ask them for their their opinion on Skylar White and on Baromir from Lord of the Rings to know if they're a good person or not. Because they'll say, like, if you hate Skylar White, you can tell they're like a misogynist or an asshole, and if they hate Boromir, you can tell they're stupid. Because like stupid people think Boromir was like a bad person, which if you watch the movies or read the books, you know he's not. Now, I have a slight issue with this ultimatum or like line of questioning. So I've watched not all of Breaking Bad, but I got up to season five. I know bad place to stop, but let me have it. Yeah, you shouldn't have to finish at that point. I'm I'm here to make an argument that there is a valid reason to hate Skylar in Breaking Bad without you being a bad person for thinking so. There's a very valid reason, and the valid reason is you're watching the show from the perspective of the criminal. Of course, you're gonna root for the person who's trying to stop him.

SPEAKER_00 24:57

I sure not root for the person who's trying to stop him. I I think it's that there's kind of two ways that you could be that you could not like Skylar. This is coming from someone who has not watched the show, but I'm aware of the show.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:10

Um, so when I'm wrong, throw it in the comments. Flame me. I don't, it's whatever. Um I feel like there's one way of being like, like you said, you're watching it from Walt's perspective. Like for the most part, he yes, he is the criminal, he is doing a bad thing, but it's like watching Ocean's 11. If you were on the side of good, you wouldn't like anyone in Oceans 11. Exactly, because you're like, well, they're committing a crime. So it makes sense when you're like, oh man, I don't like Skylar because she's against the protagonist. Protagonist also happens to be terrible. It's when if you try to apply it to real life and try and be like, no, she's an objectively bad person, then it's like, all right, thank you. Uh then it's like, uh no, Walter White's the bad guy, he made and sold meth. So that's that's my whole point.

SPEAKER_01 26:12

That's my whole point. Like, I from the perspective of watching the show, you're like the whole point, you're not supposed to like Skyla because she's made out to be like the the bitch wife who stops a walt from selling meth. But in real life, she's the the normal person that doesn't want her husband to be a criminal.

SPEAKER_00 26:29

Yeah. So it's like I think if you're annoyed by her, it's fine. I think the people who are like, I fucking hate her, like fuck you, you're terrible. Dude, get shut up. That is a it is she's doing incredibly fair things in the show because I think you know, if I was married to Walter White and he was cooking meth, I think I'd be at least a little bit annoyed with him.

SPEAKER_01 26:54

Yeah, now I do think there is a valid reason to hate her because of her scenes with Ted in the show. You haven't seen it, but they are the most cringeworthy things. And then oh they're so bad. Um and she like she doesn't really cheat. She kind of cheats. Not really, but also he cheated on her on her, like morally, I guess. So that's a thing. Uh but yeah, that that was my whole thing. Like, from the perspective, like when you brought up like Oceans 11, yeah, from the perspective of the criminal, of course you're not gonna like the reasonable, good person who doesn't want to be involved in the crime. That's understandable, but like in reality, yeah, the Oceans 11 people are criminals, Walt's a criminal. Same with the GTA main cast, like people hate Amanda in like Michael's wife and GTA. Yeah, she is more of a reason because she does cheats on him, but um Yeah. She's also trying to be.

Distinguishing Fiction and Reality Will Help You As A Person

SPEAKER_00 27:51

Um, but it's like it in a in the fictional sense, it's so entertaining because the idea of pulling off these elaborate heist is just an entertaining thing. Yeah. Um, it's just, you know, if someone has the inability to, of course, separate fiction from reality. Which I would hope most people have that ability. I think some people do struggle with it, to be honest. There's definitely some people that struggle with it. And it depends on what it is. I think there's more people that are gonna struggle with like maybe a parasocial relationship to a YouTuber rather than like Call of Duty. Like, I'd hope there's less people out there that are like killing people with guns is cool, versus someone being like, we're friends.

SPEAKER_01 28:40

No, I think I think the thing I've come across most where it's like people struggling to distinguish reality from fiction is like expectations of what their own life and like love life can be with other people. So, like one thing that I really had to learn is that when I was younger and I was watching like friends for the first time watching sitcoms, I there was a point like early on where I was like really depressed that my life wasn't as fun and entertaining as those in sitcoms, but then you realize that it's a uh as a sitcom episode's like 20-25 minutes, which usually takes place over the course of like one or two weeks in all those characters' lives. You're getting a 25-minute snippet of two weeks of someone's life, and then it's still even more like not realistic, the amount of stuff they do in those times. So, like no one's real life is ever gonna be as entertaining as a sitcom. Maybe for a day it might be just as entertaining, but it's not never gonna keep up to that level. Then there's also the whole thing of like you know, uh romance books, having the expectation that your partner's gonna be the perfect prince or princess, you know, do everything perfect all the time, have the massive shlong, but also be kind and caring, uh, you know, all this stuff. So I feel like that's what people struggle more, rather than not necessarily like the oh yeah, crime is good type side of it.

SPEAKER_00 29:57

Well, yeah, yeah. I I think the other thing people could struggle with is like expectations of things like a body image or like kind of the top 1%. Because you also get people who there's a lot of like fitness content creators out there, and there's a lot of really good ones, but some people, even like some of the best ones, people could misunderstood that like you're seeing you know 10-20 fitness YouTubers regularly, maybe let's say if you're into that sphere, and you go, Man, they're all massive, they all look like this. They're the top less than 1%. Yeah, like the average person does not look like that, and that's no shame onto these people that are like massive bodybuilders, good for them, but like the normal person doesn't look like this. These people make money off of being ripped, and it is a very, very rare chance that like anyone has that ability to do it. Like, not everyone that tries to do this makes it. Most people that try to do it don't make it, and they just have all of the time and money to get yoked.

SPEAKER_01 31:06

Yeah, no, I've been looking at a lot of fitness content recently because I've been trying to, you know, get into better shape and everything. And one thing that I think a lot of people don't realize, and even I've had to like remind myself, is that let's say, for example, getting below like 18% body fat for a guy already puts you in like the top like 5% of the world in terms of like health and fitness. It's like the amount of people who are actually that fit is like super, super, super low. The average person is middleweight, overweight, you know, not super fit. The average person, the average person doesn't work out at all. Like, I think globally, the average person does not work out. Maybe the average person like walks enough to keep themselves, but like they don't they don't run, they don't go to the gym, they don't swim, climb, etc. If you're already doing those things, you're already doing better than like half the world's population.

SPEAKER_00 31:54

Yeah. No, I saw something that like I thought was really good, and it's good for like obviously like the good content that makes it is like showing people certain exercises and just showing off how ripped you can be, because then you can like I don't know, think that you're gonna be like that. But every once in a while you get one where they're like, Oh, like, are you looking to do like learn how to do pull-ups and like do it like or you know, successfully doing pull-ups, and you're really disheartened? It's like, okay, well, like try doing a dead hang for five seconds or something like that. Like, try doing like, can you do a dead hang for like 10 seconds? Or like, cool, so you're better than like 60% of the people in the world, like, not everyone can do that even. Or they're like, Oh, you're only going to the gym two times a week for 45 minutes. Okay, you're doing better than like X percent of people. Like, just because what you see on the internet you see often because you look at the internet often, doesn't mean that's reality. Like, most people aren't like that because these people, it's their job to look like that, to uh you know, have their content, you know, only film after they've gotten a gnarly pump. Because that's the other thing. A lot of these people that are like massive, the pictures they take and the videos they take, they get a pump and their muscles are like extra like like looking good.

SPEAKER_01 33:13

Perfect lighting, dude. I don't even work out really and like under certain lightings, I feel like I look good, and I don't even work out.

SPEAKER_00 33:19

Yeah, same. Like it's every once in a while, like right lighting, like right something, I'll I'll flex it. I'm like, god damn. Yeah, and then there's some days where I look in the mirror and it's like eh, yeah, fat ugly. That's just what is this? Yeah, like that's that's just it, and I think kind of like back to GTA, most people don't think that that is reality. There is a very, very small percentage of people that think that that can be a reality, and they don't act upon that, which is a good thing. But where you get people that have a hard time distinguishing reality, I think is like that. Because like I when we were like high school, I don't know, maybe middle school, Instagram was coming out, and there are so many people, you know, like models and actors and like really attractive people posting a Photoshop, maybe not you know, super edited, but like you know, professional lighting, professional like color touches up, like they could cut acne off or like little blemishes, like a they were professionally attractive, so they were in a very, very like rare less than one percent. They also have all of the like things that you can do to make you look better, better lighting, you know, they're hitting a certain pose. Um, you know, they they it's right in the morning, they just took a shit, they're like at their lowest weight, you know, something like that. There's so many of them. I feel like when we were younger, I don't think we had an issue because we didn't get on Instagram too early, but there's definitely a lot of people who basically saw people showing that they are really attractive, yeah, and then everyone was like, I gotta do that, and also I have to post about it.

SPEAKER_01 35:03

I mean, it was a thing back then, but it's gotten progressively worse and worse and more egregious over time. Like, even just in I I keep seeing comparisons of like the ideal male body in movies and like the early 2000s compared to now. You look at like the original Wolverine or the original Toby Maguire Spider-Man, and that was like peak male physique back then. Now, compared to the shit you see, it looks kind of pathetic.

SPEAKER_00 35:23

Like, compared to Bro, Toby Maguire, yeah, in that original movie, absolutely no shade. He got like he beefed up for it. Fucking nothing compared to like four. Kamal Nangiani got super ripped for a movie that no one watched. Yep. Which sucks. I mean, I guess it's good to be healthy.

SPEAKER_01 35:46

Well, like you look at Wolverine in the in Wolverine versus uh and Deadpool, like he's way more ripped than he's ever been yo. When he's like old, which doesn't make any sense. Yeah, I think the main similar going back to the point about sitcoms, I think like a general thing when looking at both fiction or other people's lives or YouTube or Instagram is that you're always only seeing a small snippet of a different reality comparing to your own life, which you experience all of. So it's very it's difficult to compare, even when you see a bunch of fitness influences, even when you see like a fitness person who's like they were just like a regular person overweight and they like had did a fitness journey and they showed you, you're still only seeing like 20 minutes of like a six-month or a year-long journey.

SPEAKER_00 36:30

Yeah. So it's really difficult to do. They're often not showing the hard parts or the bad parts, they're showing the best parts. It's like if someone gave you a like a highlight compilation of best plays in baseball of all time, and it's a 10-minute compilation, and then that's what you saw, and then you assume that that is what every baseball game is like. You would be so fucking shocked. Because A, there's a lot of time in baseball where nothing is happening, but B, it's a highlight reel. And that's kind of what a lot of people put out on the internet is like they're putting out the highlights, the exciting part. They're not putting out the lugging around cameras and lugging around uh, you know, things for lighting and trying to take the right picture for 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_01 37:19

I mean, not even that, they're not even showing like on a 5 p.m. on a random random Thursday afternoon, they get like a sad text and they're depressed for an hour.

SPEAKER_00 37:27

Yeah, like they're not showing the years of time they've spent learning how to edit photos or do whatever their craft is. Like, no one that's the people that are super ripped, they they got that over years, and honestly, to some degree, probably good genetics, and to even more degrees, maybe steroids. Yeah, often steroids. So, like, it's so hard to compare yourself to what people put online because the people who are professionals putting things online in a way aren't real, they are real people, but it's like how reality TV isn't real. Yeah, it's edited and poised to be the most interesting thing it could be, but like it's not real life. Like they set them to act, they set them to be crazy, like it's not they put them in like it's it's similar with my YouTube videos.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

It's like my YouTube videos is not a fake version of me, but it is a version of me why cut out me being bored and not saying interesting stuff, and just sitting there and and and crying and grinding, you know?

SPEAKER_00 38:35

Um it's the highlight reel of your stuff.

SPEAKER_01 38:38

Yeah, I mean I've seen there was a post I saw like a year ago or something where it's a guy takes a photo of his body and he's like, This is my this is my physique after seven years of going to the gym, and it's like a good physique. He's not like crazy over the top, he looks like kind of like Wolverine one or like something like that. And all the comments are like, you look like that after seven years, what a waste of fucking time. And like most of the comments are like this, they're like, what a waste of time. And I'm like, I'm like, are we seriously at a point in the world where like we can't appreciate someone just doing something good to their body and then not need feeling the need to go over top like crazy? Like there's there's this really bad mindset with the gym, which is that you need to always continuously get bigger and better and improve and get stronger no matter what. So you can get to like a good degree of health and then just keep it. You don't need to keep yeah doing more. But for some reason, nothing wrong with that. It's become a fucking phenomenon that you just need to do more and more and more and more, and I don't get it.

Stop Listening To Gym Bros and Listen To Us

SPEAKER_00 39:35

Well, there's more than one reason to work out. Getting big and strong is cool, and it is at the back of my head while I'm working out, but also like the big reason I work out is for health. I want to be healthier and I want to gain muscle and do good things for my body so that as I age I don't have issues. There's a big issue where like a lot of women don't hit weights because it's seen to not be a thing that that is feminine, and so they never do weight training, yeah, because they don't gain any muscle. But you're gonna put on muscle, you're gonna put on some muscle. You're it takes a lot of work to be really toned and really jacked. You'd have to do a lot to to kind of have that, but then uh osteoporosis is an issue a lot more in women than in men because it's I don't know what else oh god, it's a weakening of like your muscles as you age, I think.

SPEAKER_01 40:34

Um because they don't do the muscle training, because they don't do any muscle training, and it's partially like not their fault because they're um I mean like a lot of guys won't either, but I think guys are also more prone to like do work around the house, you know, carry the heavy stuff, which like probably helps a little bit more. Also, guys have testosterones, they naturally have more muscle as well, yeah, which does help.

SPEAKER_00 40:57

Yeah, well, a lot of times so first of all, osteoporosis, it's the weakening of the bones. Um but training helps your bone strength as well. But training helps your bones, especially the muscles around it, because if you have no muscles around it, your bones are taking more of that weight, yeah, and then they're more likely to become weak. So you have this issue of like a majority or a much higher percentage of people with osteoporosis are women because they've just been told to only do cardio, be as slim as possible, don't work anyway. It's like don't, and it's like, no, working out for your health it should for every single person be the bottom line. There's nothing wrong with going in and being like, Oh, I want to tone a little bit, I want I want to get a little bigger, but like the bottom line for everyone in the gym should be I want to either improve or maintain good health. Yep. Like everyone should be doing cardio, everyone should be doing a little bit of weightlifting because balance is a good thing in life.

SPEAKER_01 41:53

Yeah, I mean, I've started doing like morning stretching again because I've realized just how it's really good. I mean, I'm not super unflexible, but like my hip joints from sitting all day, you know, playing games and stuff, my hip flexes have always been bad, but they are really, really bad. I did like a 10-minute stretching routine two days in a row, and my legs just hurt constantly now because of it, because I'm not used to it, and that's fun. Yeah, it's really good.

SPEAKER_00 42:17

Yeah, well, that's that's kind of the flip side where you like you get a lot of women who don't do any muscle training, you get a lot of men who do not for the life of them fucking stretch. I should be better about my stretching. I'm bad at it, but I'm trying. Yeah, but then you get to points where like you get older and you're like so immobile because you just didn't do that. That's not to say that's not to like freak anyone out if you're like, oh my god, I have to do this. Like, if you're young, if you're our age, if you're roughly our age, if you're younger, you're a little older. You have so much time, and there's always time to start turning things around. But like there is more than just the reason of being as big and strong as physically possible in the gym to going to the gym.

SPEAKER_01 42:58

Like, yeah, like my parents are starting going to the gym more health now that they're older because they've they're more conscious about like their bodies like falling apart a bit more. But like if you're I'd say if you're under the age of 30, I think once you get past 30, it's much I think I saw a graph earlier that once you hit 25, which I just turned, uh, you slowly start to lose like peak physical athletic performance, like year after year, slowly. It's like really if you're before uh oh like younger than 25 is like the perfect time to start getting fit, but even like before 30, even before 40, still will be fine. But I mean, any time is good to go.

SPEAKER_00 43:34

It's just the older you get, the harder it is to build muscle. You can still, it's just more difficult. Uh but if you build a ton of muscle when you're young, there's like yeah, you don't have to worry about it.

SPEAKER_01 43:49

I saw a thing that was like I I can't pull up a case study, uh like a source for it, but I saw a thing that was like if you spend like five years building muscle, like just trying. Purely training, building muscle. Like muscle has to like I can't remember if it's just called muscle memory. There's like your muscle, your muscles once you uh I'm explaining this bad. I'm tired, my voice is not working. I need to speak properly. Jesus. You could do this. Thank you. So basically, when you train your muscles and make them grow, get stronger, even if you stop working out for a while and then lose that strength, because you've trained them in the past, it's much easier to get that muscle back.

SPEAKER_00 44:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:27

Like much, much easier. Your muscle basically has memory of how it used to be. So as long as you train really hard for like one portion of your life, like why even if you don't train for a while, when you get older, it's gonna be a lot easier to stay healthy. So like that's why a lot of people like say like it's good to get into good shape before you want to have a kid. Because like when you have a kid, you're probably not gonna have a lot of time to go to the gym, be healthy. So like if you got healthy before that, it's gonna help you a lot that you know when that kid's grown up, you can get back to that state a lot easier. It also, like, I know being fit like makes actually pregnancy a lot easier. Being in better shape helps it, yeah. So there's a lot of benefits to it in general, of course.

SPEAKER_00 45:06

Yeah, like having better health is always a good thing. I I think I guess coming back to like the the reality portion of it is there's a lot of people that almost get disheartened from the gym because they go a couple times and they're not super jacked because it's not how it works. But if everyone you're seeing on the internet is super fucking jacked, you're like, Well shit, like oh man, like I'm not reaching this potential, and it's like that's not the potential you should be reaching for.

SPEAKER_01 45:35

No, you should be trying just to make yourself better every day. I will say though, the reason I get disheartened from working out is because I work out, realize how weak I am that I'm sore for like five days, and I'm like, fuck, I hate this. Like, I think it's that first hurdle is the most difficult thing. Yeah, the first like four weeks of working out is by far the most difficult because like you're just sore for every single day during that whole month.

SPEAKER_00 45:58

What I will say is if you if you stick with it for like a little longer, especially if you haven't been like working out a whole lot or like lifting weights, like when I really started lifting weights, the gains I was making in that first couple months were so noticeable and it was so nice. And that can also be the issue. Oh, dude, the the new start is the new gains are crazy, it's so nice. Um, I am a person who can put on weight more easily, both in muscle and in fat. So I think it came a bit easier to me. But like, if you can stick with it for a couple months, usually you can start to see it as long as you're doing it at least somewhat right. And that's that can be really positive. Now, then you hit the uh kind of opposite where uh you don't see the same gains you were making at the very beginning, which makes sense, but it's like feasibly to gain muscle, you need to both be intaking protein and you need to also be hitting weights. Yep. If you're already intaking more protein than like equates to how much weights you were hitting, if all of a sudden you start hitting weights, that's you just like reach your base level essentially. So it's really quick to get there, but then after that you have to really start pushing. But yeah, I the hardest part about working out is getting there. If you just go, I'm just gonna go, I'm just gonna do a couple things, maybe you do just a couple of things. That's better than nothing. Yep, that's a lot better than nothing. Or maybe you go and then you're like, all right, I'll I'll I'll do I'll do a bunch of stuff. Like, I'll I'll do it. But like, you can just get there. 10 minutes of working out is still better than zero minutes of working out, and once you can get into the rhythm, then usually you can kind of go from there. I'm not saying it's not easy, but like no, it's definitely difficult.

SPEAKER_01 47:51

I think the thing I've been trying to do is that um I think I prefer working out at home anyways because like less of a barrier to entry of like having to go to the gym because I just know I fucking won't do it. But I think for me, if I did want to go to the gym, I'd rather work out at home for like a couple months first, get to like a baseline level fitness, then go. Because I I went to the gym like a few years, like four years ago when I was still at uni. I remember going with my friend, and I think I over because I didn't I hadn't gone to the gym like ever at that point, really. Um and my stamina's always been like sort of my worst trait. I've always been like fast strong, but my stamina's always been bad. So like I think I overworked myself that first session, and I like threw up afterwards because I like did way too much, and then I didn't go back because I was like, this sucks. Um yeah. So want to build a better baseline before I I go too hard into it. I'm also still injured at my shoulders, so I can't really do much upper body stuff. So stretching it is, baby.

SPEAKER_00 48:52

Yeah, what and stretching is good, like doing yoga, a is a real workout, and b can be really good with something I watched.

SPEAKER_01 49:00

Yoga and stretching like gets the heart rate up, dude. Like holding some positions. Yeah, something goes hard.

SPEAKER_00 49:05

Like Jesus. Yeah. Um I my two hacks are A, I have a buddy that I work out with, and also um, I go to my local rec and senior center, so it's less like gym broy, and so the people around me are less ripped. There are people who are stronger than me. Like, very much so. Like, there's definitely there, but then also there's just a bunch of people who are like 70 and they're doing their little tiny weights, and I'm sitting here and I'm like, I'm crushing it.

SPEAKER_01 49:40

So yeah, mulk those old people I like, yeah, pretty much.

SPEAKER_00 49:45

I I love I love the rec setter because it's way chiller, because like I feel like a planet fitness or something like that, like a like a real like a bodybuilder gym is just so like it's intimidating and can be it's intimidating, and it can be tough, especially if you're beginning. Because it's also like you walk in, you're like, I don't know what I want to do, and that's where like that's finding good YouTubers can actually be good. Of like, there are because it's becoming so big, there are people who are successfully becoming YouTubers who are like for beginners.

SPEAKER_01 50:20

Yeah, yeah, there's there's a lot of I mean, that is the the up there's a downside of like a modern social media with all like the unrealistic stuff, but the upside of it is there's so much and fantastic information out there that's being posted thousands of times per day. Like, all you need to do is pick one really good like fitness youtuber that you feel like you can trust and just follow what they say, and you'll probably be good. Like, yeah, there's so many different workouts, it's like push-pull leg splits, there's full body splits. I personally like full body because I just like it's just the simplest thing, just everything at once. Sure. Like, if you follow one thing, like you said, something is better than nothing, as long as you're not doing something seriously wrong, like it'll be helpful, like no matter what.

SPEAKER_00 50:58

Yeah. Um yeah, I wouldn't even if I was going to if I was starting out and you have absolutely no knowledge, I wouldn't even bother with like trying to figure out what to do, just do things. Um starting on machines isn't a bad way to go because they're usually safer in the sense of like they have a specific motion, it's really hard to like injure yourself, or like you could accidentally like drop a dumbbell or like go too hard and like pull something.

SPEAKER_01 51:24

Um honestly, even before machines, like the the one punch man workout, which is like obviously not this hard, but just the workouts themselves, it's like push-ups, body weight, squats, um, sit-ups, and running.

SPEAKER_00 51:37

Like that's kind of like bodyweight things are really good because you can also do them anywhere. Yeah, if you want to start, just do however many push-ups you can at home for a couple reps, do a bunch of sit-ups at home, and then a bunch of squats, and like you've gotten started. And just what I like to do is I just slowly build up my repertoire of things that I like, and then slowly over time I figured out like what does a back day look like if I'm hitting mostly back? Or like what you know, what is multiple workouts, but it's a lot of stuff to learn, and you do not need to know all of it at once.

SPEAKER_01 52:12

So, like, start slow again, and then like we said, the top like five percent of fit people to get to that level, you kind of just don't need to know anything. Like, you do push-ups, pull-ups, sit-ups, squats, and run a bit, you'll get into the top five percent of fitness quickly.

SPEAKER_00 52:26

Yeah, because you also have to hold like the relativity of people of like there's a lot of people who just don't work out like at all. Yep, so you going to the gym, you're already in, I don't know, maybe the top 30%. I have no idea what the stat is, but like you're already doing very good just going alone. And you know, if it maybe if you're bigger or if you're just not in shape, like people shouldn't be judging you. I'm sure there might be, but like honestly, fuck them. If they're judging you for trying to better yourself, they're the bad person. So, like, go to the gym. If you're like, oh, I don't want to see like people see me, like it's difficult, I know, but just do it. Because like Yeah, I mean, from what I know again, if they judge you, they suck.

SPEAKER_01 53:13

Yeah, from from what I know, people at a gym, they either don't care or they will come up trying to help you because they know better. Like, if you go to a gym nothing but bodybuilders, like they will probably like be nice.

SPEAKER_00 53:25

You know, and if not, then they're just assholes and they're not worth your time or your opinion, like or their opinion, I guess. But um, one person I like her name on on Instagram, or I guess Instagram, YouTube, uh, Henley Fitness. It's literally just at H H E N L E Y, and then Fitness. I think she's great, and she does a lot of like videos that are that are literally you have no idea how to do this thing. I'm gonna show you exactly how to do this thing, and she like demonstrates, she kind of describes like what's going on, like she does more than that, but like she's really good, and I also think like she's in good shape. Um, and I I've definitely like I've been watching her for a bit, and she definitely like has gotten in even better shape, but she's not ultra ripped or anything, although she's kind of getting there. But like some of the earlier videos watching was like she knows what she's talking about, but she's not, and she's like in shape, but she's not like crazy, and it's like that's almost kind of nice to watch where you're like, Oh, this is a real person that knows what they're talking about. Whereas like, I I love Jeff Nipper, that guy's fucking massive. Yeah, I was gonna say like not attainable anymore.

SPEAKER_01 54:36

People giving fitness advice that have been like overly massively ripped for like years, it's kind of like the thing of like, don't ask how to make money from someone who's been a billionaire for like decades because they don't really know how to do it anymore. They say they can do it again, and like I'm sure they probably could, but like it's not the same because they're also starting off with the knowledge and skills and backbone to like know how to do all this shit. If you ask someone who's like super fuck, if you ask like uh why don't I want to say Jeff Goldblum? Who's the fucking really big Jeff Nippard? No, not Jeff Nippard. I was gonna say the the mist the world champion bodybuilder guy, I can't remember his name for some reason. Oh Chris Bumstead. If you ask Chris Bumstead, oh yeah, how how to how do I get fit? His advice is probably decent, but also he's coming from a place of like he already knows all this shit perfectly, he knows how to do everything perfect. He's gonna tell you to do the fucking all these like crazy workouts that like there's some workouts that if you don't have the right form for it, you'll straight up just don't train the muscle at all.

SPEAKER_00 55:38

Yeah, and some workouts can be hard to start because they can like even at the lowest level can kind of have like a semi-high like weight to it. Like, there is some people who if you're starting out doing an incline like bench press or just a bench press, even if you just have the bar, some like that's 45 pounds. What 22 kilos, some 20 kilos? Yeah um, like sure, for people that lift weights, that's not that heavy, but like if you literally have never lifted weights, that could still be heavy. And there's nothing wrong with going lower than you need to.

SPEAKER_01 56:14

Yeah, absolutely not. Like, I don't know what I'd be able to bench. I don't know if I've ever benched before. I maybe I may did it in high school once, but I've never actually like gone. I've done like I've done like um like dumbbells, but I've never done like an actual bench press with a bar, I don't think. Yeah, I'd be my shoulders are a bit fucked, but I'd be intrigued to know what I can do.

SPEAKER_00 56:32

Yeah, I'd be curious. I it's my bench is worse than I I feel like every time I go up to it, I'm like, I could I could do pretty big, and then it's not. I can do like 135. It's not terrible, but it's like that that's the thing. It's good, it's probably better than a majority of people, but it's not what the high-end like big bodybuilder guys can do. So it's like so like oh man, I can't left much. Like, that's that is good. Yeah, there is nothing wrong with that. Yeah, I mean, and that's the thing, it's like you should only really do whatever you can do is great yourself to yourself.

SPEAKER_01 57:07

Yeah. As long as you're doing better than last week or last month, like you're doing fine in German, I think.

SPEAKER_00 57:14

And even if you're not, sometimes you go down and that's fine. Sometimes there's times where you're like, you're busy, you don't hit the gym, but like just getting back out there is what's important and like staying with it. I mean, there's gonna be there's gonna be weeks where you're like, I don't know, you're busy, you got school, you got something going on. Like last like kind of like end of November into December, I barely hit the gym because it was just like holiday season and I just had a ton of stuff going on, and it happens, and that's fine. Uh, but going out and doing it, if you can, is great. And again, at the baseline, if you're not interested in bodybuilding, if you're not interested in or cutting and being super lean, because that's the other thing. There's a lot of people talk about bodybuilding, but like there's also something very impressive about having muscle, but being quite lean as well. Um there's multiple goals. There are some people who have a hard time putting on weight, so it's not really a good goal for them to be like bodybuilder physique when they're more of a lean runner physique, naturally. So then they should just focus on getting some tone and then just keeping that nice kind of like I don't know. Really, everyone should focus on being healthy first. Yeah. Once you've achieved that goal, then you can push yourself to more things.

SPEAKER_01 58:31

But like because especially like I see so many big, big guys that like have zero flexibility and can't even like wipe their own ass. And it's like, what are we doing this for?

SPEAKER_00 58:40

They're they're like walking around and they can't get like this. Is as far in they can get their arms, and it's like you're extremely jacked, but also your flexibility is terrible. It's like it's a balance, like you should be doing some cardio, you should be hitting weights, you should hit weights on all of your muscles. Don't avoid your legs. Your legs are important. If you don't do squat, you won't be able to get off the toilet when you're old.

SPEAKER_01 59:05

Real.

SPEAKER_00 59:05

That's a real one. And you don't want to die shitting.

SPEAKER_01 59:09

No. Is it better to die shitting or or shitting die?

SPEAKER_00 59:18

Oh, okay. I don't know if I should even indulge that

Dan SHOCKS Chad

SPEAKER_00 59:22

one.

SPEAKER_01 59:22

No. So it's getting it's getting a bit hot in my room.

SPEAKER_00 59:27

Dan's taking off. What what if you took it off and you were just like Arnold ripped? That'd be awesome. I would that'd be really funny if this entire time we were like, guys, you know, just be your best, like it's okay, whatever. And then we're like, so anyways, and just flex on the people as hard as possible. Fucking yoked. Yeah, that'd be that'd be sick as hell. We're not. We're not. That'd be would be really cool. It would be fun to have just like a sleeper build for uh for years. Okay, well, okay. Okay, this feels this feels like this was planned, and I don't like you.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:05

So um uh for those of you who don't know, this is uh a Manchester United jersey, uh the football team I support, and uh a couple of nights ago we we beat Hajjad's team, Liverpool. Yeah, I know. Look, he looked fuck off. Um those ones, bitch. No. How'd you feel about it?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:28

I'm not sucking on anything. Uh I don't know. We haven't really had for for being in what fourth place, we I feel like we we've had not that good of a season, and it's partially I'm spoiled with the fact that Liverpool's been good for a hot second.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:48

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:49

But like And then all now.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:51

And United's battle when we hit you. Twice a season.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:54

Okay, okay, okay. Chill. You are currently statistically a better team than us. Thank you. Technically speaking, off of the amount of points you've won.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:08

And head.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:11

Within this year, sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:16

But also fuck you. Um Yeah, this was personal, and I don't know if I want to talk to you anymore. Uh you do. Let's be real. God. Yeah, you're probably right. We just we just end this after here. Like, we have like a really mild fight, we end it, and then never do the podcast ever again.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:50

No, I'll do it, I'll just replace you.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:52

It's just no I'm re I'm not replaceable. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:56

I'll replace you with Alan. Get two United fans on here.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:00

Ah. That'd be the worst crowd you could possibly think of. Well, this is Arsenal fans. Ah, yeah, that's true. Okay. We can't we can be united by our hatred for Arsenal.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:11

Uh, who are maybe gonna win the league now because they want to game. They actually might win the league now. City fucked.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:17

Which is funny because they've been uh on top for a long time, but also they're they classically love to bottle. Um I mean they were second for a little bit. They were second for a short period of time. Yeah, yeah, City tied Everton, which is crazy.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:33

Um yeah, kind of a nuts game. And also Spurs also wants that also out of the relegation zone, so both bad things have happened apart from United beating Liverpool, which was the best thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:44

Um I will say it is technically good for me that Aston Villa lost, even though I didn't want them to lose to Spurs. Um but that does keep Liverpool in fourth. Um, that's the thing is honestly, unless we really fuck it up, we should still get Champions League football. And fourth and third is not that much of a difference that I really care.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:04

No, but it just it's just it means a lot to me.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:09

I know you've been beaten down by a bad team for a while, and you guys have a glimmer of hope, and that's really nice for you.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:17

And maybe it'll be appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:19

You're welcome.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:20

I'm sure it won't.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:22

Yeah, it kind of has been the trend as of late. I have no idea what's gonna happen with Liverpool. I mean, it's just been a weird season because like we're in fourth, which is not bad.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:32

You guys can like rebuild your whole team to be honest. Not a whole team, but like a lot of positions you need to sort of rebuild.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:37

We have a lot of good players, though.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:40

I don't know, it's weird.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:42

I mean, Salah's probably gonna go. I think Alice's gonna be. Sure, he's gonna go. Allison's probably leaving. Van Dyke is probably getting close at the very least. Robertson's leaving. Robertson hasn't been performing for us, anyways. Not that I like I love the guy. He's just his biggest he has a lot of talent, but his biggest thing that set him apart was his insane pace, and he's just gotten older and his pace has started to drop. So then it hit a point where it's like, okay, well, that was your selling point, and now the selling point's gone. Yeah, so I don't know. We'll have a bit of a rebuild. It's a weird thing. I'd be curious to see if slot rebuilds in a way that's productive towards his style. Because that was the one thing is we won the fucking league under him literally last year. Yeah, but also he basically just adopted a very good team, and I think he pretty much just played us like Klopp was playing us because he was like, Well, this works, and then once we won, he was like, I'm gonna try my own stuff. And then turns out that wasn't it. But we've also been in better form lately.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:53

I think it just turns out that bald Dutchmen are not very good at managing football teams.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:56

Yeah, um, when in doubt, don't trust uh Baldwin, apparently. Exactly. Sorry if you're bald and also Dutch, but might not be trustworthy. Because you have some bad experience with a bald Dutch man.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:12

Yeah, yeah. Yeah I iron Robin touch me, no, you didn't. Um no! I have I have seen him though, I've seen the back of his head. And he wasn't a school, so no. I'm not giving any I'm not giving allegations, his kids went to our school. Don't worry about it.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:33

He seems like a very cool and nice person. I'm sure he's lovely. Probably. No idea. We lived in the city he lived in. Um

Outro

SPEAKER_00 1:05:44

Yeah, Dan, I think that's uh I think that's all I got for today, unless you have any more comments for me about anything.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:51

Um No, I just hope that by the next time we're talking here, my soul has been taken by the International Crime Syndicate.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:57

Hopefully not. But also Film it. I want to see how they extract souls.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:03

I mean, honestly, I'm quite interested as well. So if it does happen, I'll let you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:07

So we'll find out. Um, but yeah, uh, moral of the story crime bad, but if you're gonna do crime, at least make it funny and hopefully victimless. And that is today's episode. Goodbye. Enjoyed. See ya.